Why the Manosphere Appeals to Some Young Men: A Therapist’s Perspective

Following the recent documentary by Louis Theroux, there has been a lot of discussion about the “manosphere” and its influence on young men.

But rather than focusing only on what is being said, it may be more useful to pause and ask a different question: why is this message resonating in the first place?

Movements like this don’t grow simply because they are loud or controversial. They tend to grow because they connect with something that already exists—often something quieter, and less visible on the surface. The questions many young men are quietly holding

In therapy, young men rarely arrive talking directly about masculinity. What tends to emerge instead are more personal, underlying questions—about where they fit, how they are seen, and whether they measure up.

Questions around confidence, relationships, and identity often sit just beneath the surface. Many are trying to make sense of what is expected of them, while also navigating comparison, particularly in a world shaped by social media and shifting roles. Underneath more rigid beliefs, there is often something more vulnerable. Fear of rejection, fear of not being valued or fear of getting it wrong. These experiences aren’t unusual—but many young men haven’t had consistent spaces to express them openly.

Uncertainty in this stage of life isn’t new—but the context in which it’s experienced has changed. They are being navigated in a world where expectations feel less clear, and comparison is constant; and when uncertainty feels uncomfortable, it’s natural to look for something that offers clarity..

Why simple answers can feel reassuring

One of the reasons these spaces can feel compelling is that they offer something psychologically powerful: certainty.

Clear definitions of success, strength, and identity can feel grounding when someone is unsure of themselves. They remove ambiguity and replace it with structure—something that can feel stabilising in the moment.

But psychological growth tends to move in a different direction. It often involves learning to tolerate complexity—recognising that identity evolves, that relationships aren’t always straightforward, and that self-worth isn’t fixed to a single measure.

Without support in developing that tolerance, simple answers can feel not just appealing, but necessary.

What actually helps

What seems to make the biggest difference isn’t being told what to think—but having space to think.

When young men feel listened to, respected, and able to explore uncertainty without judgement, they are often less drawn to rigid narratives. In many ways, the need isn’t for more answers—but for more understanding. There’s been important progress in supporting emotional awareness in recent years. What is still developing is how we support boys in navigating identity and emotion—without framing masculinity itself as a problem. Without that guidance, it’s understandable that some look elsewhere for clarity.

Most young men aren’t looking for power—they’re looking for a sense of direction, respect, and belonging. The question isn’t only how we challenge certain messages.

It’s how we create environments where they’re no longer needed.

Where support can make a difference

Having a space to explore identity, pressure, and expectations—without judgement—can be a meaningful alternative.

At MindKind, the focus is on providing accessible, affordable, and specialist support for young people, particularly at a time when many face long waiting periods for help.

Therapy isn’t about telling someone who to be. It’s about giving them space to work that out for themselves.